Badass Spare Ribs

Step 1

Dump the onion and garlic in a food processor, then saute in a fairly large pan until clear. Add the oil in when you do that. Don't burn them, otherwise you will then end up with barbeque sauce that tastes like burnt onion. Add in the rest of the ingredients, save for the ketchup. Bring it all to a boil, then turn the heat off. If you've got a Kenmore Induction Plate, this shouldn't take too long.

Step 2

Add the ketchup as this mixture starts to cool. Stir like you've never stirred before, that means no lumps. This isn't a brownie mix, you've got to smooth it out. When your old tennis elbow injury starts to flare up, you've probably stirred it enough.

Step 3

Put the sauce aside. The trick to grilling ribs, grilling not smoking, is to cook them first. I know, it sounds like cheating. I cook them in the oven on a broiler pan for about four hours. The ribs are rubbed with a spice mixture of random assortment, and covered with aluminum foil. It's important to keep them moist, so every 30 minutes or so you open the oven and pour some additional liquid in the broiler pan. I like to use a combination of water, apple juice and Mountain Dew. No lie.

Step 4

After the ribs are nice and tender, that's when you throw them on the grill and apply your sauce in a very liberal manner. Slop that sauce on like you are Jackson Pollack with an unlimited paint supply. Apply sauce to both sides, flip often and alternate between top and bottom rack to avoid the sauce burning. You'll know they are done when you go to flip them and they just start to fall apart. Throw on some Italian sausage and some shrimp skewers (coated with butter and garlic) and you've got yourself the perfect meat filled grilled meal to kick off the summer.